Saturday

It’s hard to believe how much time we have been here already. This week, Chris and I ironically were both on vacation. We had plans for a staycation to take the boys and do stuff around our area that we don’t often get to do between both of our schedules. Hard to believe that week is almost over. 

Last night I had a bad dream. I was looking for something. One of the boys maybe. Throughout a big parking lot and building. I was walking fast and running in my search. There were bad looking people in cars all over and the scene appeared very sketchy, almost like drug deals or something of the sort were waiting to take place. I didn’t want them to see me and see that I was an innocent bystander out of place, somewhere she didn’t belong. I ran in to a building and at the end of the hall were more bad guys, I turned to run back and another bad guy had entered with a huge machine gun about to take fire. I turned to run away from fire thinking, it’s a machine gun, surely I’m going to get shot, the bullets will go everywhere. I remember realizing I couldn’t run or escape it and I just got down on my knees to the side of the hallway and curled myself up in a ball as to shelter myself from the ammunition that had begun to go off. I heard bullets everywhere, but nothing hit me, I felt no pain. Then I woke up. As I laid there for a moment reflecting on such a strange dream, I smiled. I thought to myself, this is God. He’s communicating to me through my dream. Letting me know that he is protecting me, protecting us, from the evil. 

Last night was a night of rest for us all. Well not for Chris. Poor Chris is dealing with something he is chalking up to his self-diagnosis of bursitis in his shoulder. He was miserable, changing positions constantly, moving from the couch to the chair. Finally at 2am Cade said I could come snuggle with him in his bed and so Chris was able to sleep on the whole couch himself and get at least a few hours of rest. Cade got a great night sleep though, which he totally needed. And we had a vomit free night. He has not vomited since yesterday afternoon (which I still feel is from the huge morphine dose he got for the drain removal). So this is wonderful progress!! 

Dr Ruge came by this morning to see him and is very pleased with how he looks. He’s happy he has not vomited and was inquiring about his ability to get around. Increased vomiting and balance issues and such would be sign of concern that fluid is reaccumulating in the ventricles without the drain. Cade did want to get up out of bed right away this morning and walked around the room a little bit. He is definitely lacking strength from everything that has gone on, but I felt he was doing better than yesterday when he got up now that all the drugs weren’t on board. He definitely wants to go home. You can see it in his attitude. He just wants to leave. He doesn’t want to play, he doesn’t want to watch TV, nothing. He does however, enjoy playing on our phones and looking at pictures and videos of his brother and cousins and other family members. The staff said this is normal behavior, he is 2, and he doesn’t want to be here. They said they would let us know if they were concerned if that time comes. Right now it’s normal behavior they expect to see from him. 

Our goals today are to get the quick MRI. We aren’t sure when that will be yet, but our concern is for whether or not Cade will be able to lay still for 5 minutes. The attending said the point of the quick MRI is that they don’t need to use sedation. So it is a question of that vs. a repeat CT scan instead b/c it’s a smaller machine and not so loud and scary. They were going to page Dr Ruge to see what he’d prefer. So we will see what happens. But based on those results as long as the ventricles look great and they’re happy with the results then that’s one more check off our list. They also changed all his medications to oral today because several were still through the IV. They want to get him on orals and make sure everything goes smoothly and he tolerates it all, once we know he is good with that, then it is making sure he’s safe from a PT and ability to get around safely. Overall, if these things can all go smoothly, Dr Ruge would like to see us be able to go home tomorrow! 

Please keep your prayers coming for healing and strength. This little man NEEDS to go home. He needs to be in his bed, play with his brother, see Henry, feel the grass under his feet. Thank you everyone for all of your love and prayers and support. We wouldn’t have been able to get through this last week and a half without it!!